“Stupid Article about Shane Certainly Didn't Help”

The New London Day published an article by Amy Sullivan about Shane's death. To say the least, it didn't make things any better.

In case it's not obvious why this is so frustrating, here's the response I've sent their editor. They might not publish it or even contact me about it, but thanks to this site I can "route around them."

(Of course, people will have to link to this for the search engines to give it any weight, but I don't really care. Those who know us, know we all had a good, loving relationship. So I guess I'm just venting.)

Your story about the death of Shane Kilhefner has greatly upset my wife and I. This woman, Ms. Pottie, was not Shane's mother. My wife, Corinne Dillingham, was his mother, and we were both very involved in Shane's life.

Shane worked part time for my dad, Mike Dillingham. He spent one or two nights, most weeks, at our house so that I could drive him to my Dad's house early in the morning for work. This past week he was with us Monday night, and his mom drove him home to his appt. Tuesday evening after work.

He was here again on Wednesday taking food home with him, and often came by just to do his laundry. He called his Mom at work (Chelsea Groton Bank) a few days each week, too, and had been to the bank numerous times just to visit his mom during the day.

It's hard enough to lose a son, but your paper has run two articles about his death and never mentioned his real family. This latest article makes it appear that Shane didn't have a real family, and for some reason needed a surrogate mother.

Ms. Pottie wasn't entirely honest. Shane couldn't play the guitar at all [added: unless he secretly took lessons and actively hid his skill from me], so there's no way he could have taught her son how to play it. Also, how could Shane have gone to her house every day for dinner, when he was so often with us or his grandparents?

If she thinks Saturday night was "unbearable," let her try to imagine how Corinne, Shane's real mother, is feeling.

We loved Shane, and will miss him for the rest of our lives. His friends like Ms. Pottie will miss him, and the pain from losing a friend is very real, but it was wrong for her to claim she was a surrogate mother and irresponsible for your paper to publish the story in that way.

I hope you'll contact me to straighten this out.