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“Chaos and Chronology”

From: Seth Dillingham In Response To: Top of Thread.  
Date Posted: Tuesday, December 23, 2008 12:43:08 PM Replies: 6
Enclosures: None.

It feels like everything has changed in the last month. It's thrown me off balance and I don't expect a return to normalcy until January.

The first big change is that Richie came to live with us much earlier than he was supposed to. Richie is Shannon's son, Lauren's half-brother, and he's 2 1/2 years older than she is. For most of his life he's been living with Shannon's mom, first here in CT, and for the last two years in North Carolina.


He's an extremely bright lad, but he's had very little discipline and, conversely, is afraid of nearly everything. He wakes up every night screaming and crying, and often sleepwalks while crying. An example of the fear: Dad and I took him (and Lauren) sledding on Sunday. Dad sat him in the sled and pulled him up the hill... but he wailed in terror the entire time… going UP the hill. (Going down it was no better, so that was the extent of our sledding.) The lack of discipline manifests itself as him tending to do whatever he wants, even when we're standing right there asking/telling him not to (hit the kitties, throw the ball at the window, jump on the couch, etc., etc., etc.)

We are making progress with him, and I'm very fond of him. His situation is just so different from Lauren's, and we weren't prepared for it. Literally — he wasn't supposed to move in until after we moved to RI. Shannon's grandmother died in November, a couple weeks before Thanksgiving, so Shannon's mom (Brenda) had to come up here anyway... it just made sense for us to take Richie then instead of forcing them to make another trip in late December or early January.

Shortly after Richie came to live here, the week before Thanksgiving, my parents moved out of our house in Connecticut to a house in Missouri. My Dad has a new job out there working for a friend (starting in January), so he's giving up his business here (which had fallen on very hard times anyway). Dad flew back again the following Monday so he can finish up his last few contracts, and will be flying back to Missouri on January 2nd.

Of course, while he was gone we gave my parents' room to Richie so he wouldn't have to sleep on the floor in his Mom's room. So when Dad came back he had to pump up his king sized air mattress… to sleep in my office.

Back in January, while I was driving to Norwalk to pick up Shannon and bring her home, our laandlords told us we have to move. They didn't push it, which is good because the house we're moving into is still occupied by Ellyn and Gary (Ellyn is my Dad's sister), Katie and Tom (two of their three kids) and my grandparents (who officially moved in with them at the end of October). They're all moving to a new house in Bradford just a few miles from where they live now, but it took 6 months longer to finish the new house than was expected. Originally they were going to move in June or July, but I just helped them pack the first moving truck yesterday!

Now that they're moving, so are we. We'll be living in Westerly, RI, this weekend.

Of course I still have lots of work to do in the midst of all this chaos, and my poor, little, pea-sized brain does everything it can to find escape routes from all the chaos.

But wait, there's one more big change coming. A week after my Dad leaves, Mike — Shannon's husband, Lauren's sire — comes home. January 9th.

Please forgive me if you've expected something from me but I'm late with it. Or if I stood you up for coffee, like I did to Joe Cascio *twice* in one week.

Life is total chaos right now, but it should start to settle down in a couple of weeks.


Discussion Thread:
  • Re: Chaos and Chronology (by Steve Davis - Office at 12/23/2008)

    Hang in there, Seth. I'm pulling for you... Steve ----- Original Message ----- From: "Seth Dillingham"

  • RE: Chaos and Chronology (by Mr Morgan at 12/23/2008)

    Hey Seth, I know it is ABSOLUTELY RUDE, IMMATURE AND UNDISCIPLINED of an adult your AGE to write about

  • RE: Chaos and Chronology (by Brenda Vanase at 12/24/2008)

    Do all comments to a blog need to be in favor of the writer? Why would an insulted writer's comments

    • RE: Chaos and Chronology (by Seth Dillingham at 12/27/2008)

      Brenda, That posting wasn't about you. It wasn't even really about Richie. It was about my life, and

  • Re: Chaos and Chronology (by Brian Carnell at 12/24/2008)

    Thanks for the update Seth. Glad to see you're still hanging in there. My daughter is a lot like that

    • Re: Re: Chaos and Chronology (by Mr Morgan at 12/25/2008)

      Brian, i totally disagree with you and you are obviously on Seth's side with your posting. A kid is

      • RE: Chaos and Chronology (by Brenda Vanase at 12/26/2008)

        Mr Morgan, although I do not know you, you apparently have a great ability to read between the lines

        • Re: RE: Chaos and Chronology (by Mark Morgan at 12/26/2008)

          Sounds like you have your days cut out for you, amigo. (Mostly just posting to let everyone know that

  • RE: Chaos and Chronology (by Brenda Vanase at 12/28/2008)

    My reaction to your chaos, is not based on my missing Richard. I felt you were 'attacking' his behaviors


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